THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT: LEGACY, RIGHTEOUSNESS, AND THE GIVING OF DAUGHTERS

Written by Abrie JF Kilian.

This article was born out of the recent Kingdom Restoration Conference held in Rock Hill, South Carolina, where I had the honour of being invited as a guest speaker by Pete Rambo. The event was a tremendous success, so much so that next year’s dates are already set: June 18–21, 2026. The conference focused on Kingdom Restoration from a Biblical Perspective, with three exceptional speakers joining me in unpacking themes such as patriarchy, nation-building, inheritance, and the distinct roles of men and women within the covenant household. This article is a continuation of that conversation—grounded in Scripture and aimed at the restoration of righteous legacy.

INTRODUCTION

In the vocabulary of heaven, compliments are not shallow tokens of praise but declarations of covenantal worth. While modern culture tosses flattery like confetti, celebrating charm over character, and charisma over covenant, Scripture teaches that the truest honour one man may give another is not applause, but entrustment. And of all earthly entrustments, none bears greater weight, nor implies deeper recognition of righteousness, than this: to give one's daughter in marriage to another man.

This is no casual gesture. In the ancient Hebraic world, to give a daughter was to entrust legacy, honour, seed, and future into the hands of one deemed worthy. It was not a surrender to romantic whimsy but a covenantal commendation, a living oath that said, “You are the kind of man I desire to see multiplied in Israel.” Such an act revealed both the father’s vision and the suitor’s proven righteousness, righteousness not merely professed, but demonstrated through Torah obedience, household integrity, and community esteem.

The article that follows will explore this divine pattern of generational trust. We will examine the patriarchal yearning to replicate righteousness through sons, the sacred role of fathers in stewarding daughters, and the giving of a daughter as the highest compliment one righteous man can bestow upon another. Alongside, we will contrast this vision with the entropy of the modern dating system, and conclude with a call to restore covenantal order, honour, and fruitfulness in our households.

SONS OF THE COVENANT — THE PATRIARCHAL DESIRE TO DUPLICATE RIGHTEOUSNESS

From the first breath of the covenant, YHWH's desire has been not merely for survival, but succession—not the bare reproduction of bodies, but the deliberate replication of righteousness. When He declared of Abraham:

“For I have [fn]chosen him, so that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of YHWH by doing righteousness and justice, so that YHWH may bring upon Abraham what He has spoken about him.” (Genesis. 18:19 – NASB95). 

He did not commend Abraham for his possessions, military prowess, or theological insight. He honoured him for his generational transmission of Torah obedience. Herein lies the heartbeat of the patriarch: to see himself—not in portrait, but in principle—living on in his sons.

This covenantal impulse is no abstract virtue. Deuteronomy 6:6–9 commands the father to embed the commandments in his son’s lives with all the urgency of life and death. The father's role is priest, lawgiver, and builder of a household that mirrors heaven. The nachalah—the inheritance—is not merely land, but law and loyalty, passed from father to son like flame from torch to torch.

Proverbs 17:6 encapsulates this ideal: “Grandchildren are the crown of old men, And the glory of sons is their fathers.” Legacy is the true metric of masculine honour. A man is not great because he has lived long, but because he has been duplicated in righteousness across generations.

To see one’s son walking in covenant is to taste immortality in the soil of time. The righteous man desires this replication as his highest form of success: not applause, not empire, but a lineage of lawful sons—living epistles of his example. And so, the true patriarch labours not only to father sons but to form them, for legacy without law is merely genetic noise. But legacy built on Torah—that is, eternal architecture.

DAUGHTERS OF ZION — THE SACRED TRUST OF COVENANT FATHERS

If sons represent the duplication of a man’s righteousness, then daughters embody his honour—his covenantal delicacy, entrusted not to the market but to the altar. In the Torahic order, a daughter is not a free agent of romantic adventure, nor a bargaining chip of social mobility. She is a deposit of holiness, a living branch of the family tree, guarded by her father until she can be grafted—not merely to another house—but into a lineage proven worthy to carry sacred seed.

This is no cultural relic; it is codified in Torah. In Exodus 22:16–17, we find that if a man seduces a virgin, the father retains authority over the union. He may consent, or he may refuse, but the seducer’s lack of covenantal honour incurs a bride price regardless. Similarly, Numbers 30 reinforces the father’s jurisdiction over his daughter’s vows, framing her not as a possession, but as one still under covenantal oversight.

Why such paternal gravity? Because, as Malachi 2:15 declares, YHWH is seeking “a godly offspring (seed).” The womb is not merely reproductive but prophetic—it houses the future of the covenant. And a daughter, like the Temple vessels, must not be handled by unclean hands. She is to be given, not taken. She is to be entrusted, not seduced.

In this light, the giving of a daughter is an act of sacred transfer, not romantic consent. The father says, in essence:

“You have proven yourself worthy to bear my honour, to protect my seed, and to multiply covenant through her.” 

Such a trust cannot be auctioned off to charm or chemistry. It demands righteousness tested in the crucible of time.

To guard a daughter is to guard the covenant itself. To give her well is to ensure Israel continues.

THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT — GIVING A RIGHTEOUS MAN YOUR DAUGHTER

In a world obsessed with external praise and public accolades, the Torah offers a subtler but infinitely weightier form of honour: the entrusting of one’s daughter to another man. It is the ultimate patriarchal endorsement, the purest covenantal compliment. To give one’s daughter is to declare, “I trust you with my legacy. I see in you what I have strived to cultivate in my sons.”

Consider the case of Caleb, a man of war and faith, who offered his daughter Achsah to Othniel—not because he was handsome, but because he had conquered a city (Judg. 1:12–13). Courage, competence, and covenant loyalty earned him the reward of a righteous bride. This was not a casual arrangement, but a sacred transaction: one righteous man affirming another by entrusting him with that which was most precious.

The wisdom literature affirms this divine logic. “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favour from YHWH” (Proverbs 18:22).

Yet the text presumes a man of substance, not one who stumbles into favour untested. The Apocryphal Book of Tobit (7:13) reinforces this position with righteous Raguel, father of Sarah, declaring that she is given “saying, Behold, take her after the law of Moses, and lead her away to thy father. And he blessed them”. She was not given through lust, but through the law of Moses. Favour is covenantal, not erotic.

In Hebraic thought, daughters are not merely given; they are assigned to the worthy. This is covenantal mathematics: righteous men ought to be fruitful. Their reward is not applause but posterity. The righteous man multiplies righteousness when entrusted with a daughter of Zion.

Thus, the greatest compliment is not “well done,” but “take her.” It is the unspoken benediction of one patriarch to another: “You are the kind of man the world needs more of—here is my daughter, multiply.”

DIVINE STEWARDSHIP — YHWH AS THE FIRST PATRIARCH

The blueprint of righteous fatherhood is not found first in Abraham or Moses, but in YHWH Himself: the first and perfect Patriarch. As Creator, He does not merely populate the earth; He establishes covenants, guards seed, and gives daughters only to those proven faithful. In this, the Most High models what every earthly father is called to imitate: measured trust, righteous evaluation, and covenantal bestowal.

Zion is repeatedly cast as YHWH’s daughter—“Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion, for lo, I come, and I will dwell in the midst of thee, saith YHWH” (Zech. 2:10). Elsewhere, Israel is His bride (Isa. 62:5), but only after covenantal preparation. The prophetic vision is not one of reckless romance, but of holy courtship under divine oversight. The Messiah—Son of YHWH—will receive His bride, the ecclesia (Qahal – קהל), only when the Father appoints the time. He gave His life to inaugurate a New Covenant, making union possible. In keeping with ancient Hebraic custom, He prepares a dwelling place for His bride(s), awaiting the Father’s command to go and gather them—to bring them home, not merely as guests, but as covenantal partners. Even YHWH does not give lightly.

Contrast this with the pagan world of antiquity, where daughters were currency, political pawns, or objects of lust. Greco-Roman thought made women autonomous in seduction yet passive in covenant. The Hebrew Scriptures shatter this: the daughter belongs to the house of her father until she is transferred by covenant to the house of a righteous husband. And YHWH Himself maintains this structure, not out of chauvinism, but out of covenantal holiness.

To be given a daughter of Zion is to receive a fragment of divine trust. It is to be handed the honour of stewarding what God Himself calls sacred. YHWH is not egalitarian with His daughters; He is exacting. And He entrusts them only to those who walk as He walks—in righteousness, humility, and lawful dominion.

THE BROKEN COMPLIMENT — MODERN DATING, SEXUALITY, AND FEMININE BEGUILEMENT

If the ancient act of giving a daughter was the greatest compliment, then modernity has transformed that honour into mockery. In the era of swipe-right courtship, fathers no longer give; daughters are taken. Righteousness is no longer the measure of suitability; charm, status, and momentary attraction have replaced character, covenant, and lineage. The marketplace of mating has collapsed into a theatre of seduction, where women peddle curated sensuality and men, devoid of standards, become consumers of visual novelty rather than candidates for legacy.

In this disordered paradigm, men no longer earn daughters—they acquire access. Women, having cast off paternal covering, offer themselves to the highest bidder of attention or the most stimulating distraction. The covenantal guardrails of Torah are scorned as oppressive, while the chaotic licence of self-authorship is hailed as liberation.

Yet Scripture does not equivocate. “None of the daughters of Israel shall be a cult prostitute, nor shall any of the sons of Israel be a cult prostitute.” declares Deuteronomy 23:17. Leviticus 19:29 adds the father’s responsibility: “Do not [fn]profane your daughter by making her a harlot, so that the land will not fall to harlotry and the land become full of lewdness.”

This is not limited to temple prostitution or transactional sex—it condemns all abdication of patriarchal protection that results in the desecration of a daughter’s covenantal value.

Modern dating has removed the interview and replaced it with impulse. It has dethroned the father, unvetted the suitor, and unanchored the daughter. Where once there was a sacred transaction between tested men, there is now a blind gamble in a collapsing marketplace.

The result? Covenantless unions, broken inheritances, and children born to men who never proved themselves, and women who were never given, only taken. The compliment is gone, and with it, the honour of both men and women.

To restore the compliment, we must first acknowledge its ruin. Fathers must reclaim their role; righteous men must again be tested; daughters must again be preserved. The world scorns this as patriarchal oppression. Heaven calls it covenantal order.

RESTORATION — RECLAIMING THE PATRIARCHAL BLESSING THROUGH COVENANT ORDER

To repair what modernity has desecrated, we must not innovate—we must return. The restoration of honour begins with the restoration of order. The patriarchal blessing—once the engine of righteous multiplication—must be revived by Torah-grounded men who know that legacy is not built in bedrooms, but in households governed by covenant.

Fathers must resume their ancient role as gatekeepers of lineage. No longer passive observers to their daughters’ romantic adventures, they must vet, discern, and approve. This is not tyranny; it is trusteeship. The righteous father asks: “Who is worthy to carry my house forward?” Until such a man presents himself, the daughter remains under her father’s covering—protected, not imprisoned.

But what of the righteous man, tested and proven? Scripture declares he is worthy not of mere companionship, but of multiplication. Isaiah 4:1 envisions a time when seven women shall lay hold of one man, pleading to be called by his name. This is not lust, but covenantal hunger—for righteous covering in an unrighteous age.

Polygyny, rightly understood, is not indulgence but divine commendation. As William Luck notes in his defense of biblical polygyny, Scripture never condemns the righteous man with many wives—only the unrighteous man who abuses them (Luck, Divorce and Remarriage, ch. 14). YHWH Himself says to David:“‘I also gave you your master’s house and your master’s wives into your [fn]care, and I gave you the house of Israel and Judah; and if that had been too little, I would have added to you many more things like these!” (2 Sam. 12:8). What is this, if not reward for stewardship?

Psalm 127 celebrates such multiplication: “How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed When they speak with their enemies in the gate.” Genesis 26:4 reiterates the reward: ““I will multiply your [fn]descendants as the stars of heaven, and will give your [fn]descendants all these lands; and by your [fn]descendants all the nations of the earth [fn]shall be blessed;”

The righteous man should not be punished for his virtue by enforced scarcity of seed. He should be entrusted with more. More daughters. More households. More honour. But only under covenant, only with consent, and only for the glory of YHWH.

The restoration begins here: with tested men, trusted fathers, and Torah-shaped households unafraid to multiply righteousness in a wicked age.

CONCLUSION — THE COMPLIMENT THAT ECHOES INTO ETERNITY

The world flatters with empty words. The Kingdom honours with weighty trust. And in that divine economy, no gesture carries more gravity than a father giving his daughter to a righteous man. It is not sentiment—it is sanction. It is not charm rewarded—but character vindicated. It is, in the truest sense, the greatest compliment one patriarch can offer another.

When YHWH covenanted with Abraham, He promised him not applause, but a lineage. “As for Me, behold, My covenant is with you, And you will be the father of a multitude of nations.” (Gen. 17:4). The same promise echoes into every man who walks in the footsteps of Abraham: to multiply righteousness through tested relationships and holy households.

To receive a wife from a righteous father is to be acknowledged as a man fit to extend the covenant. To give a daughter is to plant sacred seed in fertile soil. Together, these acts form the backbone of generational fidelity—the divine mechanism through which Kol-Israel lives, not only in memory, but in flesh and faith.

We live in an era where this vision has been buried beneath individualism, feminism, and romantic chaos. But the call remains. Let fathers rise again as guardians of glory. Let sons become worthy of legacy. Let daughters be given—not taken—into households of honour.

And let righteous men remember: you were not made to merely find a wife, but to be found worthy of one. May YHWH entrust His daughters to your stewardship—and may your seed rise to honour His Name.

REFERENCES

• Friedman, David. They Loved the Torah: What Yeshua’s First Followers Really Thought About the Law. Baltimore: Messianic Jewish Publishers, 2001.

• Josephus, Flavius. The Works of Josephus: Complete and Unabridged. Translated by William Whiston. Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 1987.

• The Lockman Foundation. New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update. La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995.

• Luck, William F. Divorce and Remarriage: Recovering the Biblical View. San Bernardino: William F. Luck, 2009.

• Philo of Alexandria. Special Laws. In The Works of Philo, translated by C.D. Yonge. Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 1993.

• Shipley, Tom. Man and Woman in Biblical Law. Self-published, 2010.

• Shipley, Tom. They Shall Become One Flesh: A Study of Biblical Polygyny. Self-published,2009.

• Tobit. In The Apocrypha. Translated by Edgar J. Goodspeed. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1938.